The morning I received the news of Professor Ajibola Omolola Falaye’s passing, disbelief washed over me. It felt like a cruel dream, impossible to accept. Her steadfast spirit, a constant presence in my life in recent years, had unexpectedly departed. Her passing, at the age of 66, just four years short of her retirement, marked the end of an illustrious and impactful academic career that began 42 years ago. She started lecturing in 1982 at what was then the Ogun State University (now Olabisi Onabanjo University), before transferring to the University of Ibadan in 1995 as a senior lecturer.
Many things can be said of her, but she could hardly be described without such adjectives as passionate, principled, affable, humble, forthright, and motherly. She was an uncanny gift that enriched our world and left it better with her amiable touch.
Prof. Falaye was more than a supervisor to me. She was a mother, a guardian, a cheerleader, a confidante, a friend, and so much more. I consider her one of the greatest human gifts God graciously bequeathed to me.
Just a few years ago, we entered a formal supervisor-supervisee relationship as I began my doctoral journey in the Department of Counselling and Human Development Studies at the University of Ibadan. That relationship, though significantly defining, was just a climax of our connection, which had naturally evolved even before it became official. As an undergraduate in the same department, I had become a fairly regular presence in her space.
I first encountered her during my interactive session as I sought admission to UI. Having met the JAMB cut-off point, I was invited, along with others, to an innovative student admission session introduced by the University. There she was, seated among other distinguished lecturers of the department, including Prof. Chioma Asuzu and Prof. Rotimi Animasaun. Prof. Falaye probably chaired the session as the acting Head of Department.
I remember how kind and warm they were, even while they attempted to grill me to ensure I was a right fit for the programme. Unknown to them, this experience was consequential for me, as I was then on the verge of making a critical career decision, transitioning from a different field where I was making steady progress. The panel performed their duties without being intimidating or condescending. They were gentle yet firm, making a lasting impression on me. I became captivated by their approach to student engagement and eagerly looked forward to starting my studies in such a welcoming environment, if successful. Thankfully, I made the first cut on merit.
After my initial experience and upon resuming at the department, I encountered her on a few occasions on the corridor of the third floor of the faculty building, which housed the departmental office and many lecturers’ offices. She was always warm in her responses to greetings, never coming across as brash but always cheerful.
I recall once going to the HoD’s office to sell a new book I was marketing, “Bitter-Sweet – My Experience with Olusegun Obasanjo” by President Obasanjo’s first wife, Oluremi Obasanjo. Although she did not purchase the book, citing pressing obligations, she received me warmly and was full of encouragement and gracious words. This interaction was another encounter with the graciousness that defined her communication and our interactions throughout her life.
I did not have the opportunity to be taught by her in my 100 level, as the course GCE 107 Introduction to Developmental Psychology was then eminently taught by Prof. Bayo Oluwole and Dr Bunmi Oyekola. Even then, her seminal work, “Introduction to Developmental Psychology,” was an indispensable resource during the course, as it was for other similar courses from her unit.
However, I was to later have other encounters with her during my study. Such notable examples were in the early days of my 200 level after I had assumed the role of General Secretary of the Faculty of Education Christian Fellowship, where she served as an advisor. She diligently provided counsel on running the fellowship and supported us financially in our programmes. My admiration for her grew during this time, and I hoped for an opportunity to know her more closely.
This admiration stemmed from her incredible personality and her specialization as a developmental psychologist with a focus on adolescent development. This resonated with me deeply, as I had chosen to venture into counseling studies to gain a deeper understanding of adolescence and youth development, driven by my own challenging experiences growing up and my desire to make a difference in the lives of others facing similar challenges.
This silent wish was granted towards the second semester of my 300 level. I received a call from Dr Tinu Akinyemi, who was unaware of my personal musings. Prof. Falaye had asked her to find a trustworthy and dependable student she could regularly send on errands. Aunty Tinu, reflecting on this somehow believed I fit the bill and arranged a meeting with her. Prof. Falaye was pleased when she met me, perhaps remembering me from previous encounters. She was also delighted to learn that I was attending and held an executive position at the Ibadan Varsity Christian Union, the same interdenominational campus fellowship she had attended and where she had committed her life to the Lord Jesus in the late 1970s. Thus began the journey of an exciting relationship that we shared until her passing.
From running simple bank errands to becoming her mini secretary, our relationship soon blossomed into a genuine mother-son bond. While I was away in Umuahia for the National Youth Service Corps, we kept in constant touch, our calls largely focusing on my well-being and her counsel on various issues.
She was thrilled when she learned I was returning to UI for my graduate studies in the unit she led—Adolescent and Youth Counselling Psychology. Although she was initially on sabbatical at Lead City University upon my resumption, we maintained contact. Fortuitously, she returned before I completed my programme, and I enjoyed her affectionate presence and mentorship. She was genuinely concerned for me and wanted the best for me. She even broached the idea of me pursuing an academic career, believing I shared her passion for knowledge transmission. She might have been disappointed to discover that I was too intellectually restless and experimental!
If my admiration for her was ignited during my undergraduate days, the succeeding years deepened our relationship, allowing me to encounter the person beneath the public persona.
My discovery of her revealed an individual who was principled, kind, and genuinely loving. Like all mortals, she was imperfect, but it was clear that she loved God, thought the best of everyone, and wholly desired to please God.
In 2017, I eventually became her doctoral candidate – a beautiful climax and a thrilling experience to learn under a truly accomplished scholar. I took it seriously and I am grateful for it. She approached her role with such humanity that it belied the formality often characterizing such relationships. She was a patient teacher who taught without coercion, inspiring reverence without demanding it.
Her principal research focus was on young people, and in many ways, she personified her scholarship. Though I never asked her what influenced her choice, I believe it stemmed from her obsession with creating a better world by focusing on today’s young ones. She left no doubt about her love for her job. She must have been greatly influenced by the inimitable scholar and pioneer, Prof. CGM Bakare, who supervised her doctorate. She was aware of the enormous responsibility such imposing heritage placed on her shoulders, and she worked hard to make a difference.
Indeed, she laboured tirelessly to make her scholarship relevant primarily to Nigeria’s needs and Africa’s as well. It is to her credit that she has now left us a rich portfolio of research covering the critical spectrum of adolescent and youth behaviour, providing timeless insights and policy recommendations.
Despite her frail health in recent years, she remained deeply concerned about the rising tide of youth restiveness in the country and deliberately tailored her scholarship to address this issue. She was convinced that the only way out of our nation’s developmental quagmire was to mobilize innovative strategies to empower and engage our young people meaningfully. To this end, she challenged us, her students, to address this problem clinically. Hopefully, her work will receive the engagement it deserves in the coming days and be duly appropriated for urgent societal renewal. May she be like that Biblical prophet who, though dead, continues to speak from beyond.
Beyond her scholarship, Prof. Falaye left us with a teaching method grounded in animated and intense engagement that could excite even the most passive learner. It is no wonder her moniker among her students was “Sisi Adolescent.” Many of her students would testify to the fun-filled approach she adopted in bringing concepts to life in her classes. She was in her element whenever discussing issues related to young people. Her petite but vibrant frame would command the room as her voice reverberated across the lecture hall, making connections with each student and weaving relatable examples that aligned with their realities.
As a supervisor, her strength lay in genuinely investing in knowing her supervisees beyond the mere call of duty. She shared in our joys and empathized during hard times. I recall her prominent presence at my wedding ceremony and the christening of our first child. Her messages on my birthdays, her words of counsel when I needed a job, and her financial support during tough times were all testaments to her care. She encouraged me through the strains of new jobs and relocations. She nurtured her students to be original, find their space, and use their voices.
I cannot forget how she urged me not to relent in completing my programme. Once, she called to tell me she was planning to travel to Canada to see her daughter and family but had decided to postpone the trip to ensure I made my post-field presentation. Despite my repeated pleas for her to go ahead with her plans, she wouldn’t budge, considering my completion an important priority for her. I was dumbfounded.
I also remember the effort she made to ensure my post-field presentation occurred on schedule. When she sensed my dispiritedness during a phone call, she switched into her motherly mode, offering profuse encouragement and assuring me all would be well. Undoubtedly, her tireless push has been pivotal in the significant progress so far.
You can then understand why writing this tribute at this time for such a beautiful soul is utterly devastating for me. Why did she have to go so soon? She deserved to reap the fruits of her labour. Why this abrupt end??? Why now?!
While she was in the hospital, I spoke with her via video call, thanks to a colleague. On the second call, she mentioned my name and promised to call me to discuss something important. Sadly, that call never happened before she passed.
Till we meet again at the feet of our Lord on the resurrection morning, adieu, Prof!
